There’s something almost magical about NYSC camps. It’s not because the mattresses are soft. No, they’re not. Neither is it because the food are irresistible. I can assure you that it’s not always so.
It’s the people!
It can be that roommate who snores like a bus engine or the girl in your platoon who always carries perfume like oxygen. The beauty of camp is in the chaos, and that chaos is powered by the characters in it.
Before long, you begin to realize that camp isn’t just a place. It’s a show. Every person plays a role. Some are loud while some quiet. Some are smart but a few are surprisingly clueless. Many come ready to learn. Others just came because they had no choice.
Whether you’re yet to register or already counting down to the NYSC orientation camp opening date, here’s a preview on the kinds of people you’ll probably meet and how they’ll shape your camp story.
The English Professors
You’ll spot these ones easily. Once they speak, it’s clear that they didn’t grow up watching Nollywood movies. Their accent is smooth and their vocabulary will leave you checking Google under your breath.
One moment you’re all joking about the horrible camp food, next thing they’re saying, “The culinary experience here is quite underwhelming.” You’ll sit there thinking, “bros, it’s just beans wey no done nah.” They pronounce “schedule” as “shed-yool,” and you’ll start doubting the “sked-yool” you’ve used all your life.
When they speak during SAED classes or during platoon meetings, everyone goes quiet. Not out of interest, but because nobody wants to look daft beside them. Most times, they’re not trying to show off. It’s just how they speak. But still, you’ll find yourself double-checking your own grammar whenever you’re around them …just in case.
The Help-My-Life Graduates
These ones get uneasy once they are handed a form to fill. From questions like “shebi surname is my father’s name?” to “please help me spell ‘Kogi’.” They’ll ask to copy your details like it’s a test. To them, corper is “copper,” and SAED becomes “said.” You’ll help them so much that you’ll start wondering if they bribed their way through school.
The “Unpopular School” Folks
You’ll meet people who mention their school and you’ll pause like, “sorry, where again?” They’ll mention schools that sound like ponzi companies or new churches. Places like “Gloryland University” or “Kingdom Ambassadors College.” You won’t find them on Google but their certificates are legit.
Some graduated from schools in countries you didn’t even know offered degree programs. “I studied in Gambia,” they’ll say, and you’ll be thinking, “Oh, so that place has universities too?” They don’t say it to show off. They’re just used to being asked and now they say it with pride.
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The Guys That Came to Flex
These ones didn’t just come to serve but they’re there to spend their daddies’ money . They are the Obi Cubana of NYSC camp. They always look fresh, never stressed, and their wallets never dry. You’ll mostly see them hanging out at Mammy market like they own the place, with plenty of food on the table and a few ladies around them. They don’t struggle for attention. It just follows them.
They don’t queue much. They always “know someone” who help them with things. Even their khaki looks somehow more ironed than yours. You just respect yourself and move on.
The Overzealous School Ambassadors
These ones talk about their school like it’s heaven on earth. Say something as simple as “I miss my school’s suya spot,” and they will regale you with stories about how their campus had suya, shawarma, catfish pepper soup spots and even a cinema.
By their forming alone, you’ll think every student of UNILAG lived in Banana Island. If it’s University of Ibadan, they’ll remind you it’s the first and the best. Forget about the ones from UNILORIN because it seems repeating “better by far” makes them feel better. You’ll soon realize that no matter what you say, their school is always superior so just smile and change the topic. It’s safer that way.
The NYSC Camp Medics
The medics are the doctors, pharmacists, and the likes. They are the elites in NYSC camp. You’ll find them at the camp clinic handing out paracetamol like it’s the cure for all problems. Headache? Paracetamol. Sore throat? Paracetamol. Stomach ache? You guessed it.
Some are humble and helpful while some act like they’re the Chief Medical Officer of Nigeria. If you studied courses like Microbiology or Political Science, just don’t offend them so you don’t hear the story of your life.
The Tribal Chiefs
These ones see the world through tribe-coloured glasses. Once they hear your surname or your accent, they’ve placed you in a box. Just try and argue about anything and it somehow turns into “that’s how una people dey do.” They sit in clusters with “their people” and carry old tribal beef like it’s part of the NYSC code of conduct.
The NYSC Camp Loverbirds
The “Love is in the air” gengs. These people fall fast and hard. By Day 3, they’re holding hands and sitting on the same bench. By Day 10, they’re already using pet names like “Bae,” “Sugar,” or “Sweetheart.” They share drinks from the same bottle and take couple selfies every now and then. They are always together like they’ve known each other since childhood. The bond is strong until reality comes knocking. Once camp ends, they realize they’re posted to different towns and the feelings die a natural death.
The Foreign Graduates
You’ll know them before they even tell you. They speak differently and complain a lot. Everything in camp is too local for them. They usually mention where they came from in every sentence. “Back in the UK, we had 24/7 electricity.” “In Toronto, we never had to fetch water.” Okay sir I don hear. But right now, we’re all here lining up for pap and akara.
Some of the foreign graduates are cool though but act like they were dragged into NYSC against their will. Just let them vibe. Camp reality will humble everyone eventually.
The Womanizers In NYSC Camp
You’ll see them everywhere in camp scouting faces. Before you blink, they’ve already toasted three girls and collected two numbers. They usually move in packs, hyping each other up like football fans. If one toasts and fails, the others will go again. They don’t give up.
These guys are slick. They’ll carry heavy buckets, walk girls to the hostel gate, and buy what they can’t even afford. All in the name of love. The funny thing is that the girls usually know what’s up. They just pretend not to know and enjoy the attention while it lasts.
The Hot and Beautiful
They’re the first people you’ll notice when you get to NYSC camp. Always dressed neatly. Their shorts are not the oversized ones most of us have and it fits like they brought them from home. The same goes for their khaki which is well-ironed and stylish. Even their belts sit perfectly.
These girls don’t stress much during camp activities. Somehow, they always end up posted to the state capital or somewhere comfortable. Never the village. Never some remote school in the middle of nowhere. It’s almost like NYSC had a soft spot reserved just for them. Dis life no just balance.
The Unkept Ones In NYSC Camp
These ones need no introduction. You’ll know them once you see them. To be honest though, it’s usually the guys. Their NYSC shirts look like they were soaked in ogbono soup, dried in the sun and then packed without ironing. You’ll be shocked how quickly white can turn into light brown.
They are not properly shaved and their hair always seems to have a mind of its own. Some even look like they borrowed their entire NYSC camp outfit from their uncle who served in 1992. It’s not that people should dress to impress but at least, dress the way responsible people dress.
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The NYSC Camp Hustlers
In every NYSC orientation camp, there’s always that one person who sees opportunity in everything. While most people are still adjusting to the camp activities, the hustlers are already selling snacks, airtime, and rendering POS services. From the second they arrive, they turn their bunk space into a mini shop.
They’re not loud and don’t market aggressively. But before the end of week one, you’ll know who sells what and who to run to when you need something urgently. While many people leave camp with just photos and memories, these ones leave with profit.
The Connected Ones
These ones are never stressed. If you need your redeployment application to go smoothly, they can help you talk to their ‘father’s friend’ who is the head of ICT. They make friends in high places fast.
Strangely though, they’re mostly girls who always seem to familiarize with soldiers and NYSC officials. They know exactly who to meet for anything and their strategy always works out for them. If anything happens in camp, these are the people you want on your side.
The Comedians At NYSC Camp
These are the unofficial entertainers in camp. Their jokes are never planned but always funny. They bring energy, laughter, and ease. Whether it’s making funny comments during lectures or hyping people during parades, they make camp bearable. They can turn the most boring SAED lecture into a live comedy show just by reacting to something small.
Most start by just being themselves and end up as camp celebrities. You’ll hear things like, “Let’s call that guy from Platoon 5 to MC the event.” Before long, even the officials are greeting them specially. They might not be the best at parade but their energy makes everyone remember them. Even if you don’t know their name, you’ll remember their face or voice.
The Over-Serious People
These ones walk like they have appointments with destiny. First day of camp, they’re already asking for SAED schedules and Career Talk flyers. While others are chasing platoon games and love interests, they’re drafting business plans and researching how to start a mini-bakery during their PPA.
They don’t play. You’ll find them with jotters, attending every seminar and asking deep questions about rural development. At night, when others gist or chill, they’re checking job opportunities online or updating their LinkedIn profile. Even in SAED classes, they sit in front.
Some of us are just trying to survive parade but these ones are not here to joke. They’re trying to become the next Dangote and see NYSC camp as the perfect starting point.
The Kitchen Warriors
You know how some people pretend not to care about camp food? These ones are the complete opposite. Their brain resets the moment they get the signal for food.
They don’t only show up early, they also know the tricks. They’ll greet the woman in charge with “Aunty you dey try o,” just to score an extra scoop of rice . And if they befriend someone who works in the kitchen? Game over. Every meal becomes a feast.
Don’t be surprised if you see them collecting two portions. They also use the meal tickets of those who don’t care for camp food to get double ration.
The Preachers and Prophets
These ones came to camp with fire in their bones. Before 3am, they’re already awake walking around the hostel and praying in tongues. “Father, this camp will not swallow me. I will not faint on parade ground!” Their energy no be here. They’re always active in NCCF. By Day 2, they’ve already invited you for 7 programs. They’ll give you pamphlets, lay hands on you and start mini-revivals in the hostel.
Some are calm and just want to share the word while others shout, cast, and bind all in one breath. When the camp pressure gets real, they’re the ones people go to for prayers. Especially those who want redeployment. So even if you laugh at first, you’ll still collect anointing later.
And that brings me to the end of the list…
NYSC camp might be stressful and frustrating but it’s actually the people that stay in your memory. You may forget your state code in the future but not the face of that guy who was the chief clown on parade ground.
By the end of camp, you’ll look back and realize that everyone added something to the experience. Even the annoying ones. You’ll remember faces, inside jokes, secret crushes, and strange bunk smells. And funny enough, someone out there will remember you too. Whether you were loud, quiet, helpful, or annoying, you were part of the story.
So go in there with an open mind. Observe, laugh, bond, and most importantly, enjoy the ride. You only get to do this once. And years from now, when someone says, “NYSC camp was mad,” you’ll smile because you were there and you lived it.
Which of the characters do you find hilarious? Let me know in the comments below! 😂